Ring, Ring, Ring,…

Yes, I understand they can call at inopportune times to sell services you don’t need or don’t want.  But, it’s Talk to a Telemarketer Day, so should your phone ring from a blocked number around 7 pm this evening, please pick up.

I may have a wee bit of a biased opinion on this subject.  I admit I was a telemarketer, I mean don’t we all give it a try in college? I sold insurance (understandably annoying) and conducted surveys (harmless).   In my experience, it’s moderate pay for a very harsh job, depending on your disposition.  For me, it was nerve wrecking.  I hated the hangups, anxiety, and pressure to make a sale for something I wouldn’t buy myself.  I very much preferred the “no cold calling” game.  Others thrive in a telemarketers position. These reps view every call as a challenge to the death and keep track of how long they can keep a customer on the phone, how much they can tick you off, and how much they can get you to spend.


You probably think you should celebrate today by harassing a poor telemarketer who is simply doing their job.  If you receive a call from a nice polite telemarketer, please listen politely and say, no, thank you” to the unwanted advice, warning, or sale.  Should you receive a call from an arrogant, short tempered, amazingly nasty person, rip them a new one and mess with them until they cry.  Below are a few ideas:

  1. Suddenly start speaking another language (even if you have to make one up).
  2. Start telling knock, knock jokes.
  3. Try to sell them your kidney.
  4. Begin discussing your childhood.  Start with your earliest memory.
  5. Sing limericks.
  6. Interrupt them with inappropriate compliments.
  7. Ask a million questions about one thing.

And in the future…