Tag Archives: science

Run, unless you’re in to it…

Should you be out and about today, minding your own business and see an unrecognizable orb in the sky, this is not a drill!  You should run unless you’re in to being abducted by alien-1531067_1280extraterrestrial beings and taken back to their lab for tests and special forget-about-it juice (no judgment).  It’s Extraterrestrial Abductions Day and according to some of my sources, all of them aren’t fans of us.  So, take precautions.  This guy may not be your friend.  Although it is rocking a fitted onsie flawlessly, its outfit change may be your beautiful Earth-proof skin.

On the other hand, if you know someone who has been abducted or have been abducted yourself, this is your holiday.  You can celebrate by taking a second trip or sharing your story with the world.  You may enter it in the comments section below.  I’m anxious to get a first-hand account of your entire detailed experience with a true brother from another mother.

However, I would not recommend you take this opportunity to interrogate the angry orange guy at your job and detrump angrymand to know what planet he is really from.  The white circles around his eyes may turn into laser beams that shrink your head and he probably has enough pull to get you banned from intergalactic travel.

A more mellow approach to celebrating today could be you on the couch with a lime Slurpee and your favorite extraterrestrial being movie.  I recommend The NeverEnding Story.  That flying dog definitely wasn’t from here.

Have fun and holiday on my friends!



Eat Your Heart Out!

While this slice of apple pie and mound of whipped cream drizzled with caramel and topped with toasted nut shavings is making my mouth water and stomach growl a little, this is NOT the pie we are celebrating today.  As the obsessed math lover, scientists or engineer in your life can tell you it’s PI DAY!  

The really weird ones will have this entire number committed to memory.


For those who barely got promoted in math and science or had to resort to bribes, sympathy, and flattery for a passing grade, the Pi constant represents the ratio between the circumference of a circle to its diameter.

pie-1446373_1280How do you celebrate Pi Day?  For ideas, you should ask a former sad lonely person, who went through school with 2 friends, a social life that mostly consisted of hanging out at the Salvation Army and watching Seventh Heaven while curled up with a physics book on a Saturday night or my sister.    She generally resorts to wearing a t-shirt with the pi insignia on it, taking a pie to work, eating a round personal pizza for lunch, and gazing far too long at all things circular.

However, I have a few suggestions of my own.

  • If you’re not skittish about getting arrested, chased or into fights, you can make cream pies and pop random people in the face, while shouting, “It’s Pi Day!”
  • You can invite your 20 closest friends and associates over for a pizza pie eating contest.  The first to regurgitate loses.  (Please record and post on YouTube)
  • You can celebrate with like minded people by looking up phone numbers to businesses you think would care and yelling, “Happy Pi Day” when they answer the phone. Y’all cheer, then hang up.  If you then begin to have a conversation about the celebration, I’ll feel sad for you.

And now, a little pi humor – well, as humorous as pi can get. 

3.14 percent of sailors are pi-rates.

What is the official animal of Pi Day? The pi-thon.

The mathematician says, “Pi r squared.” The baker replies, “No, pies are round. Cakes are square.”

For more math jokes visit www.ibtimes.com.

Holiday on my friends!